Steps in dealing with conflict.

1. Wyoming Association of Municipalities Annual Convention June 12th, 2009 Conflict Resolution Presented by: Juliet Daniels & Bill Taylor University of Wyoming Cooperative Extension Service

2. Conflict is natural, inevitable and necessary ! Conflict creates tensionand pressure for change and all change creates some conflict. 2

3. Have you experienced conflict in a meeting? Yes No

4. Did the conflict result in a positive or negative outcome? Positive outcome Negative outcome

5. Nonviolent Action Administrative Arbitration Inaction Facilitation Judicial Negotiation Mediation Legislative Violence Increasing formality & 3rd Party Influence Continuum of Approaches to Conflict 5

6. Personal Antagonism Shift from non-personal, external disagreement to the other person being seen as the problem Social Transformation of Conflict 6

7. Issue Proliferation “I don’t like your horse either !” “You slighted me back in 1975?” Antagonism moves from specific to general Social Transformation of Conflict 7

8. Triangle Problem Talk aboutnot with Social Transformation of Conflict 8

10. Overly protective or defensive emotional responses by self or others

11. Emotional or hostile environment9

13. Participants may not get upset as quicklyEmotions in Conflict Situations 10

15. Those who grew up in nurturing environments may interpret explosiveness as hostility and recoil from a hostile person

16. They may speak past each otherEmotional or Hostile Environments 11

18. Denial of one’s power is a small step away from abusing it

19. Significant power inequalities provide occasion for abuse of power

20. Constructive conflict transformation will work toward a balance of powerKey Principles of Power 12

21. Kinds of Power Exploitive Manipulative Competitive Nutritive Collaborative 13

22. Which power do you use most often? Exploitive Manipulative Competitive Nutritive Collaborative

23. Which power is most often used over you? Exploitive Manipulative Competitive Nutritive Collaborative

24. Sources of Power 16

25. Will collaborative conflict resolution work? Yes No

27. The dispute is not over constitutional rights or societal values

28. There are enough diverse issues to provide opportunities for trade-offs

29. The parties are readily identifiableCollaborative Processes may work if… 18

31. There is relative power balance between the parties (i.e. nobody can dictate the outcome)

32. A continuing relationship is likely

33. There is a realistic time deadline

34. Parties are motivated to negotiate issues on their meritsCollaborative Processes may work if… 19

36. Create the guiding coalition

37. Communicate the change vision

38. Empower broad-based action

39. Generate short-term wins

40. Consolidate gains and make more change

41. Anchor new approaches in the cultureHow Does CollaborativeConflict Resolution Work ? 20

43. Blockers

44. Approvers

45. Experts

46. Interested public Collaborative Process –Who should attend? 21

47. Be an unbiased “process agent” Fosters attitude that conflict is an opportunity,not a threat Role of Facilitator 22

49. Agenda

50. Logistics

51. Conducting

52. Follow - UpPlanning the Meeting 23

54. Do use only “I” statements, not “you statements

55. Do use symbolic gestures to show your sincerity – hand shake, call, card, etc.

56. Do put yourself in their shoes – (What are they feeling? Why? What are their needs?)

57. Don’t deduce their intention from your fears

58. Don’t blame them for your problem

59. Do discuss each other’s perceptions24 Conflict Resolution Do’s and Don’ts (cont.)

61. Don’t reveal statements made in confidence to the facilitator – the neutral party

62. Don’t use names or derogatory personal statements

63. Do have everyone participate actively

64. Do allow each person to speak

65. Do give spokesmen authority to speak for their groups

66. Don’t put out media releases without consensusConflict Resolution Do’s and Don’ts (cont.) 25

68. Focus on interests, not positions

69. Invent options for mutual gain

70. Insist on using objective criteriaPrinciples of Effective Dispute Management 26 *Handout: “Conflict Resolution Styles”

73. Look for mutual gain

74. Insist on using objective criteria

75. Make their decision easy - BATNAInventing Options 27

77. How prepared are you to settle for your BATNA? How much impetus does this give you to find an agreement?

78. What will be the BATNA of the other parties?28

80. Planning

81. DiscussionThree Stages of Consensus 29 *Handout: “Workable Agreements”

83. Role confusion or usurpation can delay or derail the process

84. See group role handoutRoles Within a Group 30 * Handout: “Roles Within A Group”

86. Their dissatisfaction

87. Their powerDealing With People 31

88. “Your goal is not to win over them, to win them over.” – Getting Past No Five Steps Go to the balcony Step to their side Reframe Build them a Golden Bridge Use power to educate Turning Adversaries into Partners 32 *Handout: “Handling Problem People”

89. THIS WORKSHOP… Provided new information Reinforced what I already knew Provided no new information

90. HOW MUCH KNOWLEDGE DID YOU GAIN? A lot A moderate amount Some Not much None

91. MY ATTENDANCE TODAY MOTIVATED ME TO THINK. A lot A moderate amount Some Not much None

92. MY ATTENDANCE TODAY MOTIVATED ME TO WANT TO LEARN MORE. A lot A moderate amount Some Not much None

93. MY ATTENDANCE TODAY MOTIVATED ME TO DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT. A lot A moderate amount Some Not much None

94. 38 Questions Thank You!