Article in The Times of Israel by Andy Blumenthal: We know that Israel wants more than anything to live in peace and that they have tried virtually everything to make peace with their neighbors, including multiple offerings of a state for the Palestinians (and even giving in to practically their every demand, often to the Israelis own detriment), only to meet with one repeated rejection after another reiterating the Arab League's Khartoum Resolution: "no peace with Israel, no negotiation with Israel, and no recognition of Israel."
After October 7, the deadly abuse absolutely could not continue any longer.
There is a time to walk away and a time for necessary action.
Nobody Wanted War _ Andy Blumenthal _ The Blogs.pdf
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THE BLOGS
Andy Blumenthal
Leadership With Heart
Nobody Wanted War
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AI generated image via Craiyon
Recently, I heard about someone who was in an abusive situation, and they were
unsure how to handle it.
At first, they said that they were shocked but also confused at what was going
on, asking themselves why this person was targeting them. Initially, they said
that they sort of just let it go, thinking that their abusive situation was just
“normal,” that the other person “didn’t really mean it,” or even that they
“somehow deserved it!”
They said that the situation gnawed at them for a long time, while the abuse just
got worse and worse.
Finally, they said that their brain just told them, “Enough is enough.”
They decided to talk to some other people, let them know about the abusive
situation, and seek answers and help. But no sooner than they started to open
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up about the abuse, the abuser took this as an opportunity not to stop or reduce
the abusive behavior, but on the contrary, they increased the abuse.
At this point, the person had no choice but to confront the abuser for what they
were doing and demand that they get help and that the abuse stop once and for
all.
How did the abuser respond?
First, they just denied it. Then they turned it around and attacked the victim,
saying it was “all their fault” (i.e., that if they wouldn’t do this or that, then they
wouldn’t hurt them), and then just seemed to ignore all the protests from the
victim as they carried on.
This upsetting situation got me thinking about the victim’s dilemma. What
should they do?
“Turn the other cheek,” knowing that the harassment probably won’t stop.
Confront the other person directly, knowing that this is unlikely to make a
difference and that they may even try to turn it around and blame you.
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Seek out others for an intervention to stop the bad actor, knowing that this
may also enrage them and make things worse.
In general, it’s always better to avoid a conflict, if at all possible. As they say, the
best way to come out ahead is to not get “into it” to begin with, even if that
means that you are the one withdrawing from a bad situation.
The problem, though, with an abuser or bully is that they often have the
tendency to repeat the cycle of violence and even escalate once they fixate on a
target, and it’s not always possible to withdraw safely from the situation
immediately.
Not to compare with what happened on October 7, but obviously this topic is on
all of our minds right now as innocent Israeli civilians were so brutally targeted.
On top of it, we saw the world doubling down on the abuse and Jew hatred. Even
in the context of an unprecedented terrorist attack that left 1,200 dead and 250
taken hostage, many still called for Israeli “restraint,” reversing the abuser and
victim roles. Moreover, no sooner did Israel respond to defend herself, then
there were loud and incessant calls for “ceasefire now!”
We know that Israel wants more than anything to live in peace and that they
have tried virtually everything to make peace with their neighbors, including
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Andy Blumenthal is a dynamic, award-winning leader who writes frequently about Jewish life,
culture, and security. All opinions are his own.
multiple offerings of a state for the Palestinians (and even giving in to
practically their every demand, often to the Israelis own detriment), only to
meet with one repeated rejection after another reiterating the Arab League’s
Khartoum Resolution: “no peace with Israel, no negotiation with Israel, and no
recognition of Israel.”
After October 7, the deadly abuse absolutely could not continue any longer.
There is a time to walk away and a time for necessary action.
May G-d grant us the peace and quiet that we so earnestly seek.
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