Banish Your Inner Critic: Transform Self-Talk - IABC Southern Region Conference 2020

Transform Self-Talk, Unblock
Creativity, and Enhance Performance
Denise Jacobs  
• IABC Connect2 Comms • 11 November 2020

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#byeinnercritic
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Success
stories and 
best
practices
https://www.flickr.com/photos/gvahim/10455956145/

What about
the
struggles?
https://www.flickr.com/photos/corneveaux/3248566797/

Important  
time for
communicators
https://www.flickr.com/photos/byrawpixel/30849315347/

Busier than
ever
https://www.pexels.com/photo/late-running-work-job-24068/

Zoom fatigue
is REAL
https://www.flickr.com/photos/code_martial/4145914957

Hard to get
message out
and pass on
information
https://www.pexels.com/photo/marketing-man-person-communication-362/

Missing in-
person
contact

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VUCA
volatility
uncertainty
complexity
ambiguity

FUD =
Fear
Uncertainty
Doubt
https://www.flickr.com/photos/tom_lin/3193080175/

“Do I have what it takes?”
https://www.pexels.com/photo/adult-art-awakening-black-and-white-220210/

Our inner
critics
Photo source: Flickr

Aﬀects
thinking
https://www.flickr.com/photos/falequin/8443342362/

The inner critic is a HUGE blocker
http://www.flickr.com/photos/richardwinchell/130344669/

Small voice
https://www.flickr.com/photos/gsmatthews/6184488858/

Judgey
commi ee
https://www.flickr.com/photos/laurabl/3322988460/

How does
your  
Inner Critic
show up?
https://www.flickr.com/photos/12392252@N03/5698444246/

Your Inner Critical Voice(s)
C R E AT I V E D O S E :
I’m not ___________________________ enough.
I can’t _________________ because I’m not as________________ as others.
I shouldn’t __________________ because I haven’t ________________.
I ____________________ because my ideas ____________________.
If I ____________________, then people will ____________________.

(Virtual)
“Snowball
Fight”
L E T ’ S D O T H I S :

Go to: 
h ps://creativedo.se/
iabcsr-jamboard

How can we
show up in
our power?
https://www.flickr.com/photos/newamericanleadersproject/6959863273/

We can’t
https://www.pexels.com/photo/monochrome-photography-of-person-on-dark-room-1299417/

Mind &
perception
management
https://www.flickr.com/photos/anieto2k/15675189976/

We can
control
what’s going
on in here
http://www.flickr.com/photos/tiarescott/3211540197/

We have
(mental)
Power Tools
http://www.flickr.com/photos/techshop/2832912619/

Neuroplasticity
https://www.flickr.com/photos/arselectronica/13994747444

A ention &
Focus
https://www.flickr.com/photos/77654185@N07/8428225936

Mindfulness
http://www.flickr.com/photos/eldave/3065425105/

Shift Focus
L E T ’ S D O T H I S :
Photo: Mind The Product SF 2019

Self-
compassion

Self-
Compassion
Template

Three Steps:
1) Amend Your
Mindset
2) Optimize
Performance
3) Amplify
Others’ Ideas
http://www.flickr.com/photos/boklm/486676439/

Shi your
mindset, be
your brilliance
so others can
be as well,
and start
doing your
best work
https://www.flickr.com/photos/jeronimooo/9640105244/

My
basketball
team

Where’s
Denise?

( “Everyone will judge me for not  
being an awesome player.
I’m going to be a disappointment.” )

“Your brain is like a
supercomputer, and your  
self-talk is the program it  
will run.”
- Jim Kwik, Founder of Kwik Learning and SuperheroYou

Imposition
Mentality
https://www.flickr.com/photos/bethscupham/7328405210

You already
know that
http://www.wordstream.com/images/persuasive-landing-pages-words-have-power.jpg

Word Choice
http://www.flickr.com/photos/mythoto/3822942678/

Say This, Not That, part 1
“I choose to/I get to”
“I want to”
“I will/I decide”
“When can I?”
“I have to” —>
“I ought to” —>
“I should” —>
“I must” —>

Say This, Not That - part 2
“Unexpected”
“New”
“Cautious”
“Prepare”
“Temporary changes”
“This is unusual”
“Uncertain” —>
“Unprecedented” —>
“Scared” —>
“Panic” —>
“Trying times” —>
“This is crazy” —>
https://www.instagram.com/p/B9zXajnJpJw/

Hack
Conﬁrmation
Bias
https://www.flickr.com/photos/jimbaker/70751294/

Swipe File of
Support

Reframe
criticism

Curious and
Open
http://www.flickr.com/photos/jonmelsa/3000222387/

I embraced
it!

A visit
creates
an
opportunity

A semblance of calm…

(“HOW CAN I WRITE A  
TEDx TALK IN A DAY???!!!”)

( “Am I as good as I believe I am? 
What if I’m a fraud?” )

“Your negative self-talk is the
No.1 barrier to success.”
– Sara Blakely, Founder of Spanx

Impostor
Syndrome
https://www.pexels.com/photo/man-person-red-white-476/

Manifestations
Photo: Dense Jacobs

Inner critic
gets stronger
as the stakes
get higher

There’s paradox with impostor syndrome
http://www.flickr.com/photos/x1brett/2279939232/

Impostors don’t get impostor syndrome!!
https://www.pexels.com/photo/red-human-face-monument-on-green-grass-field-189449/

Remember
the Impostor
Syndrome
Paradox
You will only experience
impostor syndrome
when you are competent
and skilled.
(re-read this as many times
as necessary.)

Women are  
highly
susceptible

Why don’t we
see ourselves
clearly?

Consider this:

And then this:

This was me:
https://media2.giphy.com/media/l0ExplZscjforkFxe/giphy.gif

Refute Your
Thoughts

Inner Critic =
Self-talk gone
awry
https://www.pexels.com/photo/thinking-environment-depressed-depression-54377/

Self-talk
Reboot
Creative Dose:

Self-
distancing
Creative Dose:

Be Your Own
Coach of
Positivity
https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Keeping_the_ball_in_their_court,_Marine_coaches_teach_kids_sports,_values_121103-M-
OB827-069.jpg

It worked!

BE YOUR
BRILLIANCE
TO AMPLIFY
OTHERS’
IDEAS

Went see
Molly
Holzschlag
https://www.flickr.com/photos/chimchim/170743702/

Magic-Maker
in my life
Photo: Denise Jacobs

First big
speaking gig:
2010

Everyone has an
inner critic

Beware:
ANT a ack!
http://www.flickr.com/photos/binux/2495709841/

ANTs =
Automatic
Negative
Thoughts
http://www.flickr.com/photos/binux/2495709841/

Rumination

Thoughts on
replay
https://www.flickr.com/photos/lifethroughjournals/37465392494/

Anti-
Rumination
Hand-
Squeeze

What’s your
brilliance?
https://www.pexels.com/photo/man-holding-book-2781195/

Are your
people
commi ing
“ideacide”?
http://www.flickr.com/photos/allyaubryphotography/2443089993/

Share Your
Expertise

Unreasonable
standards –
can’t make
any mistakes
http://www.flickr.com/photos/diepuppenstubensammlerin/7648792510/

Excellence≠P
erfection

In this
together

Fast forward
to 2015:
keynote in
Tel Aviv

Two years later, I saw this Tweet:

Dana: gave a
talk, then co-
founded a
group (!!)

You’ll see
yourself
diﬀerently
Creative Dose:

You’ll
operate from
your zone of
genius
https://www.flickr.com/photos/drainrat/16666157505/

You’ll
become a
stronger
leader in this
new era

Inner
struggles will
still exist
http://static.ipaustralia.com.au/store3/10/78/1078354.1.high.jpg

Self-care is
critical
creative dose:

Refill your
cup

What would
you be able
to do with a
banished
inner critic?
https://www.flickr.com/photos/rvm_71/5011353192/

“If I didn’t have an Inner Critic, I would…”
L E T ’ S D O T H I S !
https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Before_I_die_I_want_to_write_an_album._(6123412737).jpg

Didn’t
believe it
possible
http://www.flickr.com/photos/mahalie/276780530/

A toolbox
https://www.pexels.com/photo/construction-work-carpenter-tools-3327/

Now you can
make magic

The potential
for greatness
http://www.flickr.com/photos/onegiantleap/4124211492/

Hold yourself
back?
https://www.flickr.com/photos/norbury/34413226423/

Or be fully
magniﬁcent?
https://www.flickr.com/photos/michaelbalint/8634008094/

Tons more
tools in my
book!
Go to
InnerCriticBook.com

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Want the slides? Go to
DeniseSlides.com

My courses
on LinkedIn
Learning
Go to
linkedin-learning.pxf.io/DeniseJacobs

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Get on my mailing list:
DeniseJacobs.com/
subscribe

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Banish Your Inner Critic: Transform Self-Talk - IABC Southern Region Conference 2020