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Salon Soleil Burningman conga line proposal
- 1. An (im)modest proposal Rescuing burningman culture from the anxiety of scarcity Faculty Moderators: Dr J. Unicorn Fuzzycuffs, PhD, OMG, STFU Prof Placebo Le Playa, PDQ, ROTFLMAO
Editor's Notes
- Now, while Hegel was not a burner, and he lived 300 years before Harry Larvy broke up with his stupid girlfriend and started this ridiculous wheel spinning. And he recognized that it was passion that got things done.
- He also recognized some of the aesthetic challenges that we would encounter on the playa.
- And ultimately, tipped his hat towards an appreciation of abusrdisim, because I have no fucking idea what this means.
- We here at placebo laboratories have been hard at work, looking for a solution to the problem of scarcity that has created an wave of anxiety thought the burner community. We recognize that this anxiety is divisive, and it is our job, as Salon Soleil, to try to heal the rift in the community. S So Jaki and I began to discuss some ideas for how Salon Soleil might be more a part of the solution, and less a part of the problem.
- We arrived at our first idea thinking that when people are anxious, they often reach for a spiritual solution. So we thought, in the interest of combining the desert environment and the world’s 3 monotheistic religions, we could create a camp that would host a (DROP) medrassa M/W/F, (DROP)a yeshiva T/TH/Sat, and of course (DROP) Sunday school the day after the burn. Then we realized (DROP) that not only had the burner unitarian camp had accomplished all this, they also made room for (DROP) Buddhism and (DROP) tantra as well.
- So then we went from the sacred to the profane and thought, why not a nashville style honkytonk? Burners love (DROP) beer, and they love (DROP) music. What’s not to like?
- But then we realized that we would primarily be drawing members of the DPW, and we abandoned this idea. But despair not. Placebo labs is never short of ideas. Well, maybe good ideas… So Dr Unicorn Fuzzycuffs came up with his best idea ever (DROP)…
- the worlds largest conga line ever seen in black rock city. Many people associate the conga line with pre-revolutionary Cuba, but a very similar dance, known as “the lock step” was a popular diversion on Victorian era beaches at the turn of the century.
- And of course, Carmen Miranda did wonders for the dance, rocketing it into popularity from the casinos of Havana…
- … to any wedding reception full of white people to this present day
- There is even a little known outtake from George Lucas’ “star wars” that contains a conga line in the Cantina scene, but was cut from the final version of the film as it seemed to diminish the menacing image of the storm troopers with test audiences. Now you may be thinking that the conga line is unknown at burningman. I mean, all that whomp-whomp music doesn’t exactly make you want to grab your neighbor’s shoulders and strut around opulent temple. But this phenomenon has some history on the playa.
- And back in the early days of the event, when it was held on private land, complete with hot springs, the backrub circle would often turn into a spontaneous conga line.
- In more recent years, there have been attempts to reintroduce the conga line tradition, Pink Mammoth did have a “sparkle ponies get free ecstacy and a gropy boyfriend” Tuesday afternoon tradition for a few years, but it never really took off
- And of course, last year our neighbors, Club Verboten, despite their reputation as “the camp that brought daft punk to the playa”, never succeeded in getting more than 5 people to join their naked noon conga line.
- Which is why we are proposing the worlds longest conga line, starting at sunset at center camp on Thursday, gathering steam along the esplinade towards 3 o’clock, then taking a transverse course across the open playa, around the man, and over to 9 oclock, before finally snaking back along the esplanade, back to center camp. But there are a lot of things going on at sunset on a Thursday, you may be thinking. That’s why, Jaki and I are proposing that we take some of our camp fees this year, and use them to pay the incomprable, David Johannsen (switch slide)
- To lead the parade, with his always crowd pleasing “hot hot hot”
- Check this out. Just imagine this on the playa. If you want to get up and dance, go ahead. This concludes our proposal…